The Oddities of Life

I once wrote a list of the top ten best things about winter, after you turn fifty.  That list was blank.  I have tried, in the past eight years, to find a good reason to amend that list.  That hasn’t happened.  Wednesday morning, at 6:30, I was walking around the track at Haverford College, dressed in about 6 layers.  It was three degrees.  And I thought, “This is how the Wooly Mammoths lived”.  And they’re extinct.  And I’m on my way.

If you’re like me, you have a bedroom closet, and you probably have about six feet, or seventy-two inches of hanging space.  But ninety-nine percent of everything I wear on a weekly basis comes from a nine inch space on that closet rod.  Same thing with my dresser drawers.  Boy, am I getting old.

Why is it, that aside from the infrequent weddings we attend, we never have the opportunity to put something, or someone, “asunder”?  There are plenty of things to put asunder in our everyday lives.  There are poker pots, pizzas, lottery winnings.  But they all end up being split, or divided.  Lets work hard to try and bring asunder back into the limelight.

This week, for those of you who were not yet familiar with him, the world was introduced to Roger Stone.  This is a man with a tattoo of Richard Nixon’s face on his back, and who is proud of the fact that he is close, close friends with President Tanghead.  I’ve tried for the past three days to come up with something witty or clever about that.  But I’m not that smart…or funny.  It made me realize the Republicans plan headed towards 2020.  To put someone into the limelight so utterly ridiculous and unbelievable so as to make Trump appear to be actually human.  Not a bad strategy when you think about it.

There’s a push going to make Election Day in this country a national holiday.  I have been touting this concept for years, as has many like-minded people.  With all due respect to Presidents Day, and Columbus Day, doesn’t it make the itty-bittiest of sense to allow everyone to have off on a day to elect the people who are to run our country?  Of course, there are a large group of people opposed to this idea.  Think about who those people are and why they are against the idea.  And that about sums up the terrible world we live in.

Let me close with this.  Groundhog Day.  A stupid, stupid idea, celebrated by thousands of inebriated people, which eventually led to a pretty funny movie.  Perhaps that means that somewhere in the future this current political term will bring some laughs to another generation.  Let’s hope that Bill Murray isn’t too old to star in the damn thing.